Staring Life~~~

Life stared at me
As I fidgeted about,
Moved by its drums,
Wanting solely to seek a refuge
A refuge in which I would be my own Queen!

Life stared at me
And I began to feel nervous
Wondering what was it that Life
Wanted from me!

Speak, whispered I to Life
Speak, please do!

Why can you not, at least once, it said
See the good things that I thrust upon you?
Why can't you love me
Why do you keep saying,
You hate me?

I opened my mouth to speak
Of how the pain of living Life as it was
Was agonizing
I wanted to tell Life
Of how I regret having left the abode of the Lord
Of how I yearn to be back up there
In the cozy warmth of the Heavens
But,
No words sputtered out of my mouth
When it dawned upon me
Of how selfish a soul Life deemed me to be!

Pray, living in a shell in which I have chosen to shelter myself
I refuse to see Life
I refuse to heal it
I refuse to cure it
To lighten her suffering
Rather, like millions of others
I keep complaining
Wishing that I had what I have not!
Wishing that I were that which I am not!
Wishing that I could do that which I am not meant to!

Life, I said shakily,
Please do forgive my whims
I shall do my best
To be as you deem me to
So that your burden shall no more feel sore
Pray,
Do forgive me
For having lived all this time
As one caring solely for me and never for you!

Life sighed heavily, then, it closed its mouth
And went back to staring at me
As I fidgeted about
And got about to do my things
As I usually did
While its drums started beating again
To the fiery rhythms of frenzy!